A Virtuous Wife

My cousin sent me a study in an email and I was challenged by it. Before you read her study I have a some words I'd like to share. Many women are in the same shoes as I am right now. Longing to be in a relationship (or running from one), longing for the right person, looking into our hearts to see who we really are, refining who we are, reminding ourselves of the person we should be and our roles in a relationship. What qualities do we want in a future spouse? Why do these characteristics jump out? Why are they important? Often we forget that we are to be the bride of Christ and that our relationship with Him should be first and foremost in our lives. It is easy to put worldly relationships and worldly possessions before the relationship with our heavenly groom. Our Heavenly Father longs to be loved by us in the same way we long to be loved by someone else. Beth, my cousin, took the passage from Proverbs 31 and looked at it as being The Bride of Christ. She introduced the following document with this statement: "This passage is no longer a guide for finding the perfect woman to live with, nor is it a "how to" guide for women in becoming every man's dream. It's God's love letter to us, modeling and challenging us (men & women alike) to become His dream." One more thing: Remember you are beautiful inside, your inner beauty radiates out. God made you in His image you are fearfully and wonderfully made. (Gen. and Ps. 39) "Your beauty should not come from outward adornment..instead it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight." ~1 Peter 3:3-4

May you be challenged and encouraged as you read this.

September 20, 2006
Elizabeth Burkholder

Preparing as the Bride of Christ
Will I be a “virtuous wife”?
a unique study of Proverbs 31:10-31

10 Who can find a virtuous wife?
For her worth is far above rubies.

Do I sense my great worth as the King’s bride?

11 The heart of her husband safely trusts her;
So he will have no lack of gain.

Can God trust me for gain in His kingdom?

12 She does him good and not evil
All the days of her life.

Am I always “good” to God? ever “evil” to God?nt>

13 She seeks wool and flax,
And willingly works with her hands.

What are the wool & flax of my calling? Do I actively seek out the materials & environment necessary to fulfill the duties of my calling? Am I willingly working in my calling?

14 She is like the merchant ships,
She brings her food from afar.

Do I go to great lengths to feed my soul?

15 She also rises while it is yet night,
And provides food for her household,
And a portion for her maidservants.

Do I awake early just to prepare to provide for His sheep? Do I remember to serve & thank those serving around & under me?


16 She considers a field and buys it;
From her profits she plants a vineyard.

Do I weigh my decisions, then walk confidently in them? Do I follow up on the fruits of my labor to ensure their profits also?

17 She girds herself with strength,
And strengthens her arms.

Do I do my part to stay strong for tasks ahead… spiritually, physically, mentally, emotionally, and socially?

18 She perceives that her merchandise is good,
And her lamp does not go out by night.

Do I value the gift of salvation I preach? Do I keep the flame of faith burning?

19 She stretches out her hands to the distaff,
And her hand holds the spindle.

Do I reach out my hands at opportunity to serve?

20 She extends her hand to the poor,
Yes, she reaches out her hands to the needy.

How am I serving the needy?

21 She is not afraid of snow for her household,
For all her household is clothed with scarlet.

Are the Family members under my care ready for the storms of life?

22 She makes tapestry for herself;
Her clothing is fine linen and purple.

Am I clothing myself with Christ for the approaching wedding day?

23 Her husband is known in the gates,
When he sits among the elders of the land.

Am I spreading the Groom (Christ)’s fame?

24 She makes linen garments and sells them,
And supplies sashes for the merchants.

Am I helping to clothe others for the wedding day?

25 Strength and honor are her clothing;
She shall rejoice in time to come.

Am I wearing strength and honor? Is that what others see?

26 She opens her mouth with wisdom,
And on her tongue is the law of kindness.

Does my mouth speak wisdom & kindness?

27 She watches over the ways of her household,
And does not eat the bread of idleness.

Am I actively involved in the lives of other believers: watching and stepping-in to speak wisdom as God shows me?

28 Her children rise up and call her blessed;
Her husband also, and he praises her:

Do my spiritual offspring see that I am blessed?

29 “ Many daughters have done well,
But you excel them all.”

Am I running the race to bring my best to Jesus?

30 Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing,
But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised.

Do I fear the Lord, recognizing that true beauty lies within?

31 Give her of the fruit of her hands,
And let her own works praise her in the gates.

Do I sense the freedom that God has given me to serve Him with my gifts?