More of you and less of me...

This phrase is so much easier to say than to walk out as I am reminded and continue to learn. The past few weeks have been a whirlwind filled with many emotions: excitement, anger, frustration, hurt, happiness, love, joy, peacefulness, anxiousness and the list could go on. It's so easy to look at hurdles and obstacles that we have to cross in life's road and to get frustrated. It's so easy to question God and ask 'What are you doing???' It's so easy to ask 'WHY?'. It's so easy to ask for answers right now and wonder when they will come. It's so easy to feel all alone and to again question why God is stripping seemingly everything away. But the most amazing thing, is God's work in the process and I can hear him saying 'wait my child, abide in me and I will give you answers as you need them.' He assures that it is ok to be angry, to want to scream or punch someone, it's ok to cry, be honest with Him about how you feel. And amidst all of these things he gives blessings that are greater than anything else. :)
I feel my heart exploding with all God is teaching/reminding/showing me right now. This song has spoken to me many times in the past few weeks:
                           
 For the past few years I've loved the verse "The heart of man plans his way but the Lord establishes his steps." (Proverbs 16:9)  and it's true, we head down the path that we feel we are being led on and God reminds us that it's not our way but His.  His plans are inconceivable but nothing is sweeter

than being in His will (but it will not always come easily). To be in His will means constant surrender of EVERYTHING.  Earlier this week I was crying and commenting about how my life is changing and so many things are out of my control, so many things are much bigger than me I can't even try to solve them. I was reminded 'Marie, do you think that is what God is working on?  Surrender the control and trust Him.'  After this lesson, I was driving in the car, still trying to analyze life, trying to figure out the why's in life, and trying to figure out why God keeps telling me to "Be Still, and Rest in Me".  (I have protested and said 'I know that but right now God I don't want to sit still! I don't want to think, and He keeps taking me back to 'Be Still, Abide in ME, REST!'  As I was analyzing, the radio announcer said 'sometimes God takes us into a place of rest to make us rest and to refresh us and to teach us.  Don't resist this rest'...haha, nothing like confirmation on what God is teaching.  The broadcaster said read Psalm 23.  A Psalm I've read many times but one I cannot get out of my head this week. "He makes me lie down in green pastures..he restores my soul."

Later in the week we went to visit one of mom's friends, the first sign I saw on her walls was 'Be still and know that I am God." I am learning to savor the hours of time that He has given me to 'be still, to rest in Him,to delight in Him.' We serve such a mighty God, one who is so full of love for us, who fills us to overflowing with his joy and his grace. We are blessed.
The last HUGE idea God continues to instill in me is to just praise Him in all things and for all things. I look at all I am blessed with and how can I not give praise? Philippians 4:4 "Rejoice in the Lord always and again I say rejoice"

A few of the blessings the past few weeks:
1.) Met my new nephew :)
2.) Saw ALL of my cousins on the Christianson side for the first time in years
3.) Was able to be home to share in the celebration of life for my grandmother.
4.) Got to be around for Landon's (new nephew) baby dedication
5.) Quality time with cousins
6.) The opportunity to help clean out my other grandma's house.
7.) God's amazing creation and beautiful fall leaves.
8.) No allergies
9.) Time with friends
10.) God's ever present love and grace.
11.) Praise and Worship music on the radio!
12.) Meeting the girls in my brothers' lives.
13.) Great time/conversations with my sister Rachel.
14.) Adventures with my brothers.
15.) A supportive, encouraging team here who are making the transition back to the states a bit easier.
16.) Learning how to pray for and empathize with people in new ways.
"Every blessing you pour out I'll turn back to praise, when the darkness closes in Lord, still I will say Blessed be the name."

What a mighty God we serve. Have a blessed weekend dear friends! :)